Choose the Temple

By Audra Elkington 

“Temple. One other word is equal in importance to a Latter-day Saint. Home. Put the words holy temple and home together, and you have described the house of the Lord!” (Boyd K Packer)

Growing up, I was taught that the temple is the place to be. Rightly so, but I didn’t truly understand what that meant. I loved going on youth temple trips, it felt good to be in the temple and I loved going on those road trips from Huber Heights, Ohio to Chicago, Illinois. It was a whole experience.

When it came time to think about getting married, I wanted to be sealed in the temple to my spouse. And I did my best to be worthy of that blessing. Not without some stumbles along the way, but thank goodness for repentance. I received my endowment just a few days prior to my sealing. It was all fine and good, but where was the overwhelming feeling of elation? 

I had expected to feel different, to have a grand revelation or change that was tangible. I loved being married and thinking about being with my husband, and future children, forever but beyond that I was left feeling a bit underwhelmed.

So, I didn’t go back.

It was two and half years before a friend finally invited me to go to a girl’s night at the Las Vegas, Nevada temple. She was so kind and upbeat about it that I decided to give it another shot. Truth be told, the Las Vegas temple had me in awe. Sitting atop a mountain that overlooks a sinful city, the temple created a sense of light in the dark. I couldn’t put it to words at the time, but looking back, I think that was a precursor to a lesson Heavenly Father knew I was going to learn in a profound way.

My little family moved shortly after that visit to the temple with my girlfriends and it was another three years before I made another attempt. All in, after my temple sealing, I made two visits to a temple – both of which left me with the same underwhelmed feeling. What I didn’t understand then, but now realized, was that it was me – not the temple.

A decade later, I finally started to feel a nudge to give the temple another try. I made a lot of deals with the Lord, mostly asking Him to help me have the courage to not back out of my commitment to go the first time.

When I finally convinced myself to attend, I went with my Dad and my son, who was going to the temple for the first time. We performed baptisms for several family members, including my Aunt, my Dad’s sister who had recently passed away from Glioblastoma and my mom’s Aunt, who had recently passed away after struggling with lung cancer.

To say it was a powerful experience to stand proxy for two women who were so special to us, is an understatement. And from that moment on, I vowed to do everything in my power to learn to love being in the temple. 

It took some time, but I can honestly say that I have grown to love being in the temple. Even in those moments where it feels hard. I feel like that is important to point out – the temple can be hard! I know it’s not that way for everyone, but life circumstances make certain aspects a bit complicated for some of us. The beauty of being in the Lord’s house with those feelings is that He can handle it. In fact, He invites us to wrestle and learn from Him. He is the only one who can restore peace to our souls.

President Henry B Eyring said, “When we are worthy to receive such teaching, there can grow through our temple experience hope, joy, and optimism throughout our lives.” I experienced this truth in a beautiful way recently.

During the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, when temples were closed to the majority of endowed members, I had the opportunity to attend an endowment session with a newly called missionary. It was an unexpected invitation, but I rearranged my schedule to be able to attend. I went with a deep feeling of being left behind. Not just in that moment, but in so many ways throughout my life. I just have always felt like I’m a few steps behind everyone else. 

In a beautiful moment, the Spirit whispered to me that even though I always feel like I’m last, I am still headed to the same destination. The Lord is watching out for me and He has me in the palm of His hand. That one simple, but much needed, lesson has made me crave time in the temple. I feel comfort in knowing that no matter how I’m feeling, the Lord is ready for me when I enter His house. 

I echo the words of President Russell M Nelson when he said, “If you don’t yet love to attend the temple, go more often—not less. Let the Lord, through His Spirit, teach and inspire you there. I promise you that over time, the temple will become a place of safety, solace, and revelation.”

The Spirit has taught me many important lessons through my journey of learning to love the temple. But, it wasn’t without effort on my part. I had to choose to live worthy to receive a temple recommend. I had to choose to make time to actually go to the temple. I had to be okay with not feeling the Spirit in overwhelming ways each time I went. I had to set aside my pride. I had to (and still have to) explain to other people (who don’t want to go to the temple) why I’ve made it a priority after not caring for so many years. And, most importantly, I have to continue to make those same choices regularly. 

Loving the temple is not a one and done decision. But, it’s a decision that is worth making over and over again. As President Eyring said, “my hope for you and for all your beloved family is that you will grow in desire and determination to be worthy to go into the house of the Lord as often as your circumstances allow. He wants to welcome you there.”

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